NAME: |
Annie Kryst |
BORN: |
According to legend, Annie sprang fully-formed from the head of Iggy Pop |
SIGN: |
Curves Ahead |
FAV ADJECTIVES: |
Decaf - Grande - Soy |
FAV SONG: |
"Rebel Rebel" by David Bowie (Her idea.) |
PET PEEVE: |
Daylight Savings Time (how do you save time? the time is the time!!) |
TURN ONS: |
Promptness, cleanliness and large Croatian men (preferably all in the same package) |
SECRET DESIRE: |
To perfect her rendition of "Heart of Glass" on Karaoke night. |
NEMESIS: |
Gravity |
FAMOUS QUOTE: |
"There are only two tragedies in life: last call and an empty liquor cabinet." |
STORY: |
Once upon a time, Annie Kryst was a Warhol Superstar, but unfortunately all record of her brilliant contributions to the Factory have been struck from the history books. (The silver Mylar clouds and the Campbell soup can silkscreens -- her ideas!!) Candy Darling and Edie Sedgwick took offense over her ill-advised fling with Joe Dallesandro and demanded Andy to evict Annie from the inner circle. Homeless and penniless, she made her way to Spain (thanks to the help of a handsome Merchant Marine, only known to her as "Jimbo"), where she was befriended by Salvador Dali. (Those melted clock landscapes? Again, her idea.)
After she grew tired of the silly mustache, Annie came back to the States and settled in Seattle. There she met Jerry Baldwin (no relation to the hunky Baldwin brothers) and his investors, who wanted to open a chain of coffee shops across the Northwest. Annie had just finished fondling -- er, um -- reading "Moby Dick", so of course, the name Starbucks was her idea. Annie is currently in a torrid sexual affair with physicist Stephen Hawking and makes her living as a professional cat herder. She continues to inspire artists, musicians and entrepreneurs across the globe. |